Date: 09/14/2006 04:24 PM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
He stroked her back in silence for a long time. "It can't ever be like that again, Hermione," he finally repeated. "You can never use me as your punishment again. You can never use me as a weapon to hurt yourself with." He drew a breath. "I'm not strong enough for that, Hermione. I'm nowhere near strong enough."
Awwww! That's so - you have this talent for writing such dignified prose, so understated and saying a wealth of feeling. That just about broke my heart. Truly.
Author's Response: The one thing I always found from Harry -- always! -- was a kind of moral authority, far beyond his years. I didn't set out to create it. That's just what he confronted me with.
Thanks for mentioning this. It's one of my favorite parts as well.
Date: 09/14/2006 04:21 PM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
Okay. Well... you know most of what I think, already. Just one thing I have left to add: This is... sobering. I loved it, and as an h'c addict I particularly loved the bits where Krum is cradling Ron and carrying and healing him, and Harry's discovery of what Ron has gone through and his indignance - his "Who did that to you?" sent chills through me - but I also loved the whole conceit fo the Crusiomancy, lovely, lovely addition to the lore of HP darl magic, and Moody's comment on them was spot-on - I mean that Cassiopeia was barmy - and then the lovely comment, with the italics, "The bitch used Cruciatus!"
But having finished it, I feel vaguely sad; I suppose it's a good kind of sad, the kind of sad that really makes me think, deeply, about things like: Where does friendship end and love begin? What are the things that friendship cannot survive? How can life go on in the face of betrayal? All of which are questions which I tend to run to fanfic to escape from, so having to answer them - well, it hurts. And if a piece of lit can make you hurt, well, it's done its job, so I commend you for that. Even though I wish it hadn't been quite so profound. Truly, this measures up to the best fan fiction I've read, and there are only two pieces, over the years, that have ever made me feel like that - all deep and thinking-like.
Okay, all that said - to me, this story SCREAMS for a sequel! A feel-good one, just because I'm a selfish bitch. You've laid so much of the groundwork: Krum fancying Ron; Krum still fancying Hermione; your Krum just needing to be grabbed and snogged senseless because he's so adorable - ahem, maybe that last was just me. (Oh, God, the passage: 'Ron looked back up at Krum, his eyes wide, his face slack.
"Rhon." Viktor's eyes, as he looked at him, were very still, very dark -- even just a little frightening. "You have told me you vill do anything to bring her-- to bring them back."
"There's another way!" Ron's voice was a scream. "There's another way! I won't-- we can't--"
Viktor nodded, a grim smile on his face.. "Is good you say dis, Rhon." His voice was just a bit husky, his accent thicker. "It vould not be good if I had to fight you to abandon her in there... But this cruciomancy -- this torture of half-bloods -- this I vill not allow."
Oh, God. The 'very dark - just a little bit frightening' - the *gravity* of this entire passage - it chills. I mean, it truly, truly does.)
...ahem. We've got Ron wishing he could do something 'this much fun' with Harry, and Harry already loving Hermione. Would it be too much work to pair Ginny off with Neville or somebody, and put this glorious foursome together for a little healin'?
I'm just in awe. I bow down, and so forth. God, I had no idea you could write like *this*. You just put all us underlings to shame. And read my other reviews to know that I don't say this lightly.
Author's Response: GUH. Oh, oh, this, coming from you, oh, this is just overwhelming!
OK, let's just start with clearing up one thing:
YOU ARE NOBODY'S UNDERLING! I DO NOT PUT YOU TO SHAME!
Anybody reading these reviews, if you want to read some of the finest Hurt/Comfort ever written, wander on over to:
and see what PutMoneyInThyPurse has wrought. This lady writes just stunning, stunning, moving stuff, and she writes teh love the trio has for one another better than anyone, ever.
I can imagine sequels to this. One sort of chugging away in the back of my head is a ficlet called "Slouching Toward Forgiveness," in which Ron, still dealing with his anger and rage, goes to staid, calm, relaxed Remus Lupin for advice, and gets way more than he bargained for.
Beyond that, well, although I started this as a strong R/Hr shipper, by the time I'd finished, I got the Trio bug, so I left the parts in play for Trio: Part of what's trouble Ron is the beauty of seeing Harry and Hermione together. Harry and Hermione's love remains. And Ginny can't accept what happened and forgive Harry. I honestly hadn't though of dealing Viktor a card in that relationship, but the more I think about that, the more interesting it seems, especially with his feelings for Hermione, and the fact that he's now got his Sanguimantic link with Ron, so he gets echoes of Ron's experience of her.
One thing I can tell you: Ron and Harry's friendship can survive this, and the love between the trio will, in the end, grow stronger and better because of their experiences here.
The fuzzy line between love and friendship was what I wanted to explore here, all untidy and confusing as it is. In too many Fics, Hermione's with Ron, and Harry's reaction to seeing them is "Ooo, ick." Well, no. Being friends with an attractive member of your desired gender does not make them unattractive, and does not unmake natural human reactions to them. There is desire. There is attraction. That's just something you deal with.
Anyway, thank you so much for this wonderfully kind review! These are words I will always treasure.
Date: 08/30/2006 09:48 AM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
How come you brought it here? And in one single flow? NOT BAD AT ALL!
Author's Response: I brought it to a respected FanFic site because I craved, as all fragile-egoed writers do, a larger audience.
I brought it to The Quidditch Pitch because they have always been a great bunch to work with. Quick to respond, polite, helpful, knowledgeable.
And, although I'd have been happy to break it into chapters similar to those I used on LJ, if asked by hte TQP staff, I always envisioned this as one single work.
I thank you very much for your kind words about this story. I'm glad you read it, and glad you enjoyed it.
Date: 08/29/2006 09:14 PM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
Wow! It's taken me a acouple hours to read this (I should have noticed the word count before I started) but once I began I couldn't stop. What a very complicated story. It has a whiff of Madeleine L'Engle, but mostly pure imagination. Thanks for a lovely tale.
Author's Response: Sorry to lure you into a quagmire that took you so long to get out of! I'm just thrilled that you enjoyed the story. I'd love to tell you that I was deliberately referencing Madeleine L'Engle, but I must confess to never having read her. Maybe I should!
Date: 08/29/2006 06:20 PM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
This story haunted me today . . . It's really, really intense and so incredibly well-written. I'm just . . . well, at a loss for words! Great job!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the very kind review. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
Date: 08/29/2006 07:11 AM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
congrats on posting here on tqp.
the story looks even better. you can see the work you (and thevina) have done to pull together the loose ends and neaten it all up. it flows really well.
i dunno what it is about this story. it part makes me cringe and read sideways through my fingers and then you'll throw in a line that i really do just LOVE. and i can't help but enjoy how much you love the characters too.
and i'm not just reviewing because i got my name mentioned at the quidditch pitch for talking about periods.....
Author's Response: Mrs. Q, this story wouldn't be nearly as good without you.
It's great that it's flowing well for readers in a single run, and I'm thrilled that it's working for you here.
Thanks again for your help, and support, and kind words.
Date: 08/28/2006 08:05 PM Title: Harry Potter and the Unwinnable Fight
There are not words enough to tell you how much I LOVE this story.
I knew I should have written notes, because right now I can't think to tell you what I loved the best. Some highlights: I loved the brown "markings" in the beginning and that you included her period...some parts of life that never make it into stories or movies. I loved that line about Harry always being gentle with her. I loved Victor. All of him. And the circle of guilt and passion and how they thought of Ron first, after the first time.
Wonderful, brilliant; a story I am sure to read over and over again.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the kind words. I'm thrilled that you've enjoyed it.
Credit whee it's due: Hermione's cycle features in the story thanks to two live journal users: mrsquizzical and harry_lvr. Mrs. Q was the one who mentioned to me that they'd been there over a month, and what was up with Hermione's cycle, and when I initially replied that I hadn't even thought of it,and supposed I assumed that the environment just took care of it, she mentioned that it would frighten Harry. So the power of that scene is due to her. And Harry_Lvr mentioned that a cycle can be up to two weeks late if a woman has just started exercising a lot, and her line became Hermione's.
I'm vastly pleased with and proud of this story, and it just transports me to know that it's worked for you.